Wednesday, September 22, 2010

opening doors, finding skeletons

This blogging thing.  Is gonna cure me or kill me.  I'm not sure which way it'll go.

As I read my chosen ones, and those they've suggested, I sometimes dredge up an old memory. 

I realize I've shelved a lot of memories.  I just need to remember why.  I know some of the whys.

The very shy little girl... that didn't have friends because she was too afraid to talk to anyone.
The naive teenager... that didn't know what everyone else was talking about.
The young woman... who let herself finally go and didn't like what she'd become.
The single mother... who realized she wasn't the nurturing mommy type.
The wife... who even though she knew all the signs married the abusive man.
The adult child of an alcoholic... that can't mourn that parent properly.

There are many memories for each of those people.  They are not the person I am now. Or, are they?
 Is that why those memories are shelved?  Each of those people has a story.  Perhaps, as I get reaquainted with them...I'll introduce them.  In the meantime, there's only me.


  1. I hope that you decide to introduce them to us. Your writing is beautiful and I'd love to hear your words. Some of these women hit really close to home.

  2. Natalie, thank you, I kinda felt like I was opening a vein here. It may take me some time to get to know them again.

  3. I think it's important to get it out. I know that there is that deep release of breath and like a weight lifting when I realize that having things that mortify me out in the open is really not that bad.

    I hope this works for you!

  4. Suniverse, thanks, I'm hoping I can't make something out of the disjointed pictures in my head.

  5. Everything Natalie said- Ditto.

    I can't wait to hear more from you.

  6. Roxane, thanks. It may not be right away. I may post silly things in between. But I'm thinking about these ladies daily now. Hopefully they'll get clearer as time goes on.

  7. We are all a collection of individuals, each one created and shaped to meet the demands of a particular stage of our lives. And as our lives change, we change . . . casting off certain elements, wrapping other pieces more tightly around ourselves, and reaching out for new garments when those are required.

    And so all of these women are you.

    And not you.

    And the "only you" who speaks today?

    Contains all of those women.

    And yet you are only you.

    Yes, I get that.

  8. Kris, somehow I knew you would. Get that. Thank you.